Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Why I havent told many friends and family

When I made the decision to speak to a local surgeon to see if I qualified for a VSG, I only talked to my husband and children about it. After my first appointment with the surgeon, I knew that should qualify for the surgery based on my comorbidities and BMI. At that time I talked to my parents and my sister about my decision. I decided that those were the only people who needed to know. I knew that there are conflicting thoughts on weight loss surgeries and I didnt want to hear everyone's opinions. I didnt want to hear all the negative stories about how they knew other people who had the surgery and either they died or they gained all their weight back. 

My insurance required things like...  a swollow test, psychiatric evaluation, chest x-rays, EKG , and 6 monthly weight check visits with a physician. It took six months to get it all done. I enjoyed the monthly visits with my surgeon as he guided me on a path of health and healthier ways to eat. 

I made a goal, then once I completed that goal, Id move to the next. My first goal was to stop drinking sodas. (specifically Dr Pepper) Once I did that, I worked on drinking more water with a goal of 64 oz a day. My surgeon also told me about the book, Eating to Live, which gives very good, healthy and easy recipes and a plan to eat 5-6 times a day (smaller meals) to get your metabolism moving. 

When I got closer to surgery I decided to tell a few more family members. Most people were good about it but I did face a few of the questions I wanted to avoid. Such as....
If you have lost some weight over the last few months, why dont you just keep doing that and not have the surgery?  Arent you afraid it will shorten your life? Then there were the stories like....  I know two people who have gained all their weight back after having surgery and then losing the weight, or, I know someone who died a year after surgery. 


I didnt want or need to hear negative stories. I have considered surgery for years and finally hit my point where I knew I needed to do something. I hit my all time highest weight and hated myself and felt miserable. 

Here I am six weeks after surgery and I still have not told many. No one at work knows what kind of surgery I had when I took 5 days off of work. My facebook friends have started asking how I lost weight. I sent private message to a few and their reaction was , "isnt that a bit extreme" and "oh, ok"  as if I took the easy way out. 


This route was anything but easy. I went through a lot of testing which cost a good amount of money. I had to begin changing the way I ate months before surgery. Surgery was not the hardest thing Ive ever been through but it was far from easy. I was sore, I vomited every time I drank anything for two days after having five incisions on my belly.  I have had to learn a new way of eating... slow. I cant drink 30 minutes before a meal or 30 minutes after. I should take 30 minutes to eat each meal and currently my stomach can only hold 1/4 cup at a time. Its a life change. I can never go back to old habits like eating a huge bowl of ice cream for dinner or drinking Dr Peppers all day. 

People can be so negative and non supportive. Dont get me wrong, many family members have been supportive but there are those out there who havent been. Im totally ok with my decision. Im glad that I had the surgery and Im still learning how my new stomach works and what I need to do to continue the weight loss. I am happy and already feel healthier and look forward to this year, the year of many more changes. 

I will decide as time goes on if I will tell others about the surgery or if I will tell them of all the other things I'm doing to lose weight... such as no soda, no sugar, no carbs, 64 oz of water and a lot of protein, and drastically smaller portions! Don't forget the exercise!

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